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Motivation

New Podcast Episode: Is Discipline Even Necessary?

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In this week’s podcast, I ask the question “Is Discipline even necessary?” In a world where people want things so quick and fast, some things still take time and consistency to achieve. I present 5 questions to ask yourself about discipline and where it fits in your life in addition to a few steps to get more discipline. I end with 10 traits discipline people have in common. LISTEN HERE

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the podcast. Email me at BernettaStyle@gmail.com

This podcast is sponsored by The Knighten Project. A non-profit organization the provides teens aging out of foster care with brand new suitcases filled with everyday essentials to aid them as they transition into adulthood. Learn more and make an impact at TheKnightenProject.org.

Motivation

2021 was Officially the Year of “Me”, plus year in review highlights

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At first I kept it to myself. I went about of month and decided to share it with my husband. January 2nd is my birthday, so it’s always the start of “My New Year!” I told him that year 2021 was going to be the year of “Me”. He initially looked at me and shook his head slowly in agreement, not 100% knowing what the year of “Me” was, but understood he somehow was about to give me his full support.

I explained that at first, I wasn’t going to say anything. This was a journey I wanted to take by myself. I didn’t even tell my best friend. However, I decided to tell him because he was going to start to see a different me, a me trying new things, a me going new places, a me expressing new emotions and I didn’t want him stopping me or questioning me, and I wanted him to know where this was coming from.

The Year of “Me”

The year of “Me” is about me getting to know me, loving on me, and doing what I personally need to do to get in the best “me” mental space FOR ME which leads to a great outward expression in my life. I started a journal in January and wrote (whenever I felt like it) what I was feeling or dealing with at that moment in time. I would never go and look back. The goal was to read it at the end of the year to see my growth and if anything has changed for me or do I see things in a new perspective.

Over the year, I put myself first without neglecting my family or responsibilities. I just found time for me. And although I feel I honestly always took care of myself. This year, I wanted to take it up a notch in many areas.

This year, I went back to therapy. Unfortunately, because of COVID, my therapist held her sessions via computer. That was good and bad. Good for her, but bad for me if my family was home. I had to find space to talk freely.

I poured more into my body and skin. Being intentional with my workouts and how I want to feel and look as a woman of a particular age.

I read (audio included) many new books , then put practices into use. I traveled places I haven’t traveled and just enjoyed seeing the beauty that God created. More walks alone and talks with God, which allowed me to learn more about my personal power. Those walks and talks, showed me who I was and what I could actually handle and let go off.

Freedom

There are many more things that I could go on about what I did for “Me” this year, but I will spare you. In 2021 my word was Freedom. I didn’t realize until writing this post, that I actually feel FREE. When I choose Freedom, it was for a different reason. That reason was work/job related (which is still something I’m working towards). But this freedom I feel now it something totally unexpected and welcomed. Taking the time to get into “ME” gave me a new sense of Freedom (freedom from my past, freedom from who I used to be, freedom from standards I held myself to, freedom from mistakes that I held on too) and for that I’m grateful.

Going into 2022, I’m going to continue the year of “Me” with a new word, FOCUSED. I like the new freedom that I have created for myself, but that brings me to somethings that I want to narrow down and focus even more on. Go deeper. And getting focused with a stronger intention will help me do that.

I will leave you with this word. This is YOUR LIFE. Try your best to live it how you want it. Everyday you have is the youngest you will ever be, so stop waiting for later (if you can) to start something. START it now, even if it’s just a step towards the direction you want to go. Step. Jump. Walk. Just go in that direction. Believe in yourself more than anyone else and create the life YOU want to have.

If you listen to Dani Faust podcast, Manifest it, Sis! she interviewed me and I briefly shared my Year of Me

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/manifest-it-sis/id1505113238 (fast forward to the last 3:45 second mark)

Will you embark on the year of “You”? Using the Manifest Journal I created is a great tool as you go through your year.

Here are some highlights of 2021 for me

January – turned 44
My son also got his driving permit. Lord be a protector.
Feb – Our pool was complete
March – Bought our first 19 units with the Langston Real Estate Group in South Carolina
Finished our office renovation
New headshots and podcast cover
April – Launched my new & improved Manifest Journal on Amazon
June – Summer Donation campaign for teens aging out of foster care headed to college
September – celebrated year 18 (marriage anniversary)
October – Son became an author
We were featured on our local abc action news for The Knighten Project
November – attended our first Diner en Blanc
Publix agreed to be our first corporate sponsor and added giftcards in our first 25 suitcases – https://www.instagram.com/p/CWLfCp9llao/
My Manifest Journal was Published in Black Enterprise
December – completed another holiday packing w/ purpose donation drive. We decided to go full time with Packing with Purpose and now collect suitcases & items all year long.
Bailee inducted into the National Junior Honor Society

Trips

Atlanta
Phoenix
Dallas
DC
Cancun

Brands I worked with

Sunny D
Moms Vote
Disney
Abbott Freestyle Libre
St. Jude
Warner Bros Movies

Motivation

My 28 Day Gratitude Challenge w/ the Magic was Mind Shifting

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Late last month, I was on Facebook (or Meta) in the Manifest it Sis! group and a friend wrote that she was about do a 28 day challenge with the book, The Magic, by Rhonda Byrne. I have read Rhonda’s book, the Secret but didn’t know about her book, The Magic. I was intrigued, so off to Amazon I went. This book has over 9,105 reviews with a 5 star rating. After reading review after review after review … I told Michelle I was in and we started the challenge November 1st.

The Magic is an interesting title. I had no idea (before reading this book) what the “Magic” was or how it worked. I soon learned that the Magic was “Gratitude”. That’s right, the magic is gratitude is and how do you activate it – by saying Thank you! Over the next 28 days, I would learn 28 different ways to show gratitude and why it’s important. I learned to say thank you for so many things that are easy to take for granted. I even wrote a letter saying thank you to someone/something that hurt me in the past (I didn’t send it but it was a great release).

The Law of Attraction

The magic shares about the law of attraction and constantly remind us that “like attract like” – whatever you think, whatever you feel, you attract to you. If you think about what you’re grateful for, “I had a great weekend with my son” and you sincerely feel the gratitude, the law of attraction says you must attract more of those things into your life. It works in the same way as metal being drawn to a magnet; your gratitude is magnetic, and the more gratitude you have, the more abundance your magnetize.

My Gratitude Blessings.

During this last 28 so many great things happened that … I’m just so grateful.

Unexpected $600 bonus from the firm I work for.
Thousands in donations for The Knighten Project.
Featured on abc action news Tampa with The Knighten Project.
Featured in Osprey Observer with The Knighten Project.
Publix became our first corporate sponsor for The Knighten Project and included in gift cards in our suitcases.
Featured in my firms Newsletter that resulted in more donations.
Surpassed our suitcase goal for our holiday suitcase donation drive.
Selected to facilitate a firmwide training at the firm I work with.
Raising almost $1000 from the firm I work for.
Doubled my stock trading my account. (then if I’m honest, made a bad trading decision and lost some money)
I got a call from a major tv show I wrote too, nothing came from it (yet)- but grateful for the call.
Finally hit 11k on IG
Got a new manager that is going to be a great addition to our team.
Free audible trial just in time to read/listen to Will Smith’s new book which came with great revelations
Found a great new track team for my daughter that’s 15 minutes from my house.
2 Free tickets to a play at the Straz.
2 free tickets to the Junior League of Tampa event
Health – the journey to stay healthy continues
My marriage – getting better and better
My children – staying happy and healthy
Catching the black Friday deals I wanted
Facebook approving The Knighten Project as an official non-profit and adding us to their charity database so now we can fundraise strickly from FB & IG
My church surprising me with a $1000 check for The Knighten Project.
The opportunity to be a charity of choice of another business/event that’s coming Feb 2022
Guest on the Manifest it Sis podcast.
Interviewed a cast member of BMF for my site (BernettaStyle)
Featured on Black Enterprise for my Manifest Journal

And of course there were more things I was grateful for this month, but I can’t list them all. One of things that I do everyday because of the book is write down 10 things I’m grateful for and why. Then read them back and say Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. So, my gratitude book is full with so many things that I’m grateful past, present and future.

Read it for Yourself

This book has opened up a whole new realm for me. I’ve always been a grateful person, but now I see giving thanks on a whole new level. I even say thank you with a new pep in my tone. Its said with true gratitude, because I’m really thankful. I can’t even tell you how many times a day I now say thank you and to who I say it too (everybody!!!).

After reading this book, you won’t want to fix your mouth to complain because you will just realize how good God is to you and how much you really have to be grateful for. One more thing before I go … Oprah said that gratitude has power, I was in the presence of Steve Harvey and he said that same thing. I understood it, but this book really made me understand it’s power on a different level and put those practices into work. It’s more than just saying Thank you. It’s about really the feeling (energy) behind the thank you too. And the blessing just continue to come. There is a shift.

I hope this post was helpful. I also hope you read, The Magic, and do the 28 day challenge with a friend and see how your life can/will be changed if you let it. 9000+ reviews and still a 5 star rating – that says a lot.

Have you ever read the book? Please come back and tell me your experience!

Motivation

My New Book Alert! Introducing the “Manifest Journal”

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Our words create our world. Write down your thoughts with intention and watch your dreams and goals manifest. This journal will give you a description of what manifestation is, why gratitude is important, vision/action board pages, manifesting books and podcast recommendations, affirmations, and thought-provoking questions. Use this tool, the Manifest Journal, to write until your dreams come true.

I’ve always written things down. Whether we called them diaries, notebooks or journals, my thoughts are somewhere on paper. I learned that there was power in the written word in my mid-twenties. Especially, if you put faith, work and gratitude behind it. We are always manifesting.

Many people approach manifestation from a place of “How can I get something to feel better?” Instead, the focus should be: “How can I feel better and therefore be an energetic match for attracting more greatness into my life?”

The mission of the Manifest Journal is to help you actually write your dreams, goals, plans, and desires out with full intention. I want you to come out of your comfort zone as YOU write out your plans for 2021.

The Manifest Journal Book includes:

- What is Manifestation & the Power of Writing Things Down
- 12 Manifestation Book list
- 30 “I AM” Manifestation Affirmations
- 21 Thought Provoking Questions
- 5 Manifestation Podcast
- 75 Manifestation Journal Pages
- 10 Vision Board Pages
- Size: 8 x 11
- 103 pages

What makes this Manifestation Journal different?

The Vision Board Pages! You’ll learn what a vision board is, and have multiple pages to create your own vision board inside the journal. Look at it daily and take it with you if you need a friendly reminder of your dreams.

Who is Bernetta Knighten?

Bernetta Knighten, also known as at the Dream Architect is a certified Life Coach who helps motivate women in developing a blueprint to follow their dreams. Bernetta is the creator of Bernetta Style, a lifestyle site and resource focused on motherhood, marriage, and motivating mothers to live the life of their dreams, one day at a time.

She created the My Dream Year Planner & Workbook for people who will commit to making at least one (or more) of their dreams/goals come true in a year. This planner is also a workbook that helps hold you accountable as you go through the next 365 Days.

She created the Manifest Journal to compliment the planner to aid you in getting one step closer to creating the life you dreamed about.

Bernetta also launched The Knighten Project in 2015. It is a non-profit organization with a goal to provide foster children with brand new suitcases filled with everyday essentials as they transition into adulthood. The Midwest native earned her Bachelor’s degree from Alabama State University and currently lives in the Tampa Bay area with her husband, and 3 children.

Bernetta lives by the quote: For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7

Family Motivation

OMG! I Interviewed Emmy Award Winning Never Settle TV Host Mario Armstrong

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Earlier this week I had the pleasure of interviewing Emmy Award winning TV Show host Mario Armstrong.

Mario is the creator & host of the Never Settle Show on Youtube. There are 6 powerful 20-25 minute episodes that provides the advice and tools to help you hustle mindfully to pursue your passions.

As I brand ambassador for the Never Settle Show, I’ve been able to witness and share some amazing content that has opened my mind in a new way.

During our interview we discussed:

What is #tangibleaffrimations
What is Mario’s next big dream
Who motivates the motivator
Why are words so important?
Why you need to watch Never Settle

Visit Neversettle.tv/tools for resources that will help move you closer to your dreams, goals and passions.

Also, check out #NEVERSETTLELIVE Build Your Dream Series – Every Wednesday at 12:25pm ET on IG Live @MarioArmstrong

More About Mario

#NEVERSETTLELIVE host Mario Armstrong is a NBC TODAY Show contributor and motivational speaker listed with Daymond John’s Shark Group’s Speaking Division.

Mario is a highly-energized, two time Emmy Award Winner, sneakerhead, lifestyle entrepreneur, techie and motivational speaker. He represents the Underdog and the dreamers, those who have a gift or passion but haven’t been able to maximize their potential.

Mario provides the advice and tools to help you hustle mindfully to pursue your passions and achieve your goals.

People know him as the Digital Lifestyle Expert® on NBC’s TODAY Show, CNN, NPR, FUSE, and more. They’ve watched him on Steve Harvey, Inside Edition, Dr. Oz, and other popular talk shows and news programs.

He recently launched The Never Settle Show, a new show on YouTube with a live studio audience, shot at Nasdaq Studios in NYC.

Motherhood Motivation

Self-Care is Not Selfish | Motivated Mom Retreat

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Over the last two years I’ve seen self-care everywhere. Women are learning that taking care of ourselves is a priority. Basically we are putting our mask on first.

However, for every woman that is getting the massage, a quiet moment of mediation or just a nap – there is a woman feeling guilty for just thinking about taking a moment for herself.

Listen! There is NO guilt over here.

Self-care is NOT selfish. Self-care is a must-do. Period. My title reads Self-care is taking me Dallas because I’m excitedly attending & speaking at the 2019 Motivated Mom Retreat in September.

Last September this retreat was the perfect ~~escape~~ getaway. It allowed me to let go of ALL mom duties, see old friends and bond with other mothers from all over the country.

3 Reasons Why Self-Care is Not Selfish

1. Are you really strong 24/7?

If you are, please share your secrets. The only way we can continue to care for our husbands and our children is if we make ourselves a top priority period. Therefore, we must refuel, so we can pour into our families from a full vessel.

2. Live NOW, not when your children finish college.

Why are you putting a date on when you will decide to enjoy life? Do you know, if you wait until your children graduate high school or college to do the things you really want to do, you will be 12-18 years older? Do it now. Let them see you do things that make you happy. Let them see you dream NOW.

3. It’s good for your overall health.

Self-care is more than a massage. Sometimes self care is going to our yearly check-ups. Self-care is paying attention to our bodies when we feel off. Health is wealth. Keeping our bodies in the best condition so we can be here and live a full life is the ultimate self care.

How can you get started with self-care? Attending The Motivated Mom Retreat in Dallas will definitely be a great first stop.

What is the Motivated Mom Retreat?

The Motivated Mom “What Motivates You” Retreat is two days full of fabulous fun, inspiration, relaxation, motivation, and pampering for Moms. Designed to celebrate the Extraordinary Mom in each of us, the entrepreneur mom, working mom, stay-at-home mom, or aspiring mom representing different socioeconomic backgrounds, education, and cultures will gather together to participate in this empowering experience.

The “What Motivates You” Retreat connects moms to the world of relaxation in a way that is rewarding and not guilt ridden. You will enjoy engaging and interactive workshops featuring some of your favorite speakers, authors and bloggers – around entertainment, education, wealth building, beauty, health & wellness, and SELF CARE!

During these two days, you will learn how to:

· Live a more intentional life
· Build better relationships with yourself, mate, kids and community
· Invest in self-care without guilt
· Budget and build wealth based on your family’s current income
· Identify your passion and life’s purpose
· Establishing healthy eating and exercise habits
· Be more engaged in your child’s education
· And much more!

During this retreat, I’m sharing my story in a session called Momories. Five women who were hand selected will share our story ranging from motherhood, purpose, our past and our present. I’ll be sharing how being diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes a few years back changed my life.

Learn more & register about The Motivated Mom Retreat HERE

Motherhood Motivation

Bailee’s Nail Box featured IN THE KNOW (AOL, YAHOO)

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I’m excited to show you my daughter’s business, Bailee’s Nail Box, featured on In The Know. An online page that focuses on kid-owned businesses. They reached out to me last week because they wanted to feature her.

After seeing similar videos online, I wanted Bailee to be featured. When they reached out to me, I was over the moon. It was actually one of those answered prayer type of things.

Running Bailee’s Nail Box is alot of work. Especially when it’s just you and your daughter (of course the hubs adds his two cents here and there). I’d been praying for a sign to keep going, and then I get this email from IN THE KNOW, which is a division of AOL and Yahoo.

Check out this video. Whoever edited it did AH-MAZ-ING!! I can’t stop playing it. Just click on the image below to watch it.

Bailee’s Nail Box is a FUN box for girls, created by 10 year old Bailee K. for girls ages 5 – 12 who love all things nails!

Bailee’s goal was to create memorable boxes filled with different tools for fun nail designs with an extra girly accessory with each box. We promise your favorite girl is going to want to collect all of the boxes and make amazing memories!

Check out our site to see our newest box and cute accessories.

Motivation

Dream Chat with Christine St. Vil, owner of MomsNCharge | Episode 13

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Christine St.Vil is a wife of almost thirteen years, mother of three (ages 7, 8 & 10), speaker, writer, author and trainer. She is relentless about helping women, particularly moms, take charge of their lives by learning how to feel good without feeling guilty.

Through her work with Moms ‘N Charge®, Purpose Driven Media™ Group (PDM) was created to teach entrepreneurs how to successfully leverage social media and blogging to start and/or grow their business and brand, without compromising the relationships that matter most to them.

Christine and I had a great chat this week around motherhood and how she runs 2 businesses. Click on the image to see our full chat.

Through her transformational book (Whose Shoes Are You Wearing? 12 Steps to Uncovering the Woman You Really Want to Be) live courses, workshops and consulting, PDM walks you through discovering and defining your life purpose, as well as making sure your business message aligns with your purpose.

Christine is an instructor in the Steve Harvey Online Success Institute, & her work has been featured in numerous local and national TV and media outlets (including VOA, Fox 5 DC, WJLA, News Channel 8, WBAL, WHUR, Madame Noire, Huffington Post, Huff Post Live, Black Enterprise, Sirius XM, RollingOut, and Essence Magazine amongst others). She received her Bachelor of Science in Biology from Marymount University.

When she’s not busy wifing, mothering or taking care of clients, she enjoys a good girlfriend chat and all things caramel. Did you enjoy the Dream Chat? We’d love to know your thoughts on our Dream Chats!

Motivation

Dream Chat with Joanaé King, Creator of Black Wives Matter | Episode 12

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Joanaé “Naetorious” King is a Wifestyle Strategist and relationship mentor that shares ways to encourage and inspire health in all relationships. Noticing a need for positive depiction of love within the Black community, Joanaé has built a platform filled with strategies and encouragement for the Black family.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Black Love is My Business. (@blackwivesmatter)

Joanaé is also the founder of BLACK WIVES MATTER ; a movement built around self care for the Black Married Woman. Joanae King is a proud wife and mother of 4. When Joanae’s not sharing wisdom with the women, she’s dancing to the beats of her Caribbean roots and hanging with her fabulous, chic friends. She is Brooklyn born, Miami-Dade County bred, and Atlanta, GA and fed.

I was able to chat with her about her business, new revelations and why her kids seeing her dream is a big deal.

You can learn more about Joanaé “Naetorious” King at Naetorious.com.

Did you enjoy our Dream Chat? I’d love to know your thoughts.

Motivation

Dream Chat with Quanyin Young, Owner of SB Boutique | Episode 11

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Quanyin Young is the owner of SB Boutique. It’s an amazing online store which has amazing outfits for the modern woman. She the married wife of 2 girls and has been in business for 6 years.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by SB BOUTIQUE™ (@sbboutique)

Quanyin dresses celebrities as well as the everyday fabulous mom like you and me! Today I was able to chat with her about her business, how she keeps going and why it was her husband that pushed her to move forward.

Check out her website: www.shopsbboutique.com for all of the latest amazing dresses!

I apologize for my side being dark. It was a rainy day, so my natural light sucked. However, the show must go on.

What did you think of our Dream Chat? I’d love to know your thoughts.

Motivation

I Found My Tribe, Literally Through AfricanAncestry.com

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It’s no secret that many of us who are of African American descent can’t trace our lineage back past slavery. If you’re like me, a big part of you might have always wanted to know.

Personally, I don’t know much about my family tree on either side. My grandmother was the youngest of 7. Her mom died when she was 2 and her father died when she was 4. She has no real remembrance of her parents, while being raised by her sisters. My grandmother (my mother’s mom) always told me that her mom was of Native American descent but didn’t know the tribe. So of course, I would walk around saying, “I got Indian in my family!” That is until I took an African Ancestry test.

What’s different about African Ancestry?

They were the pioneers of DNA testing for African Americans. They’ve been in business for 16+ years.
Identifies the African country of origin.
Identifies the specific African Ethnic group.
The largest database of African lineages. 33,000!
They DESTROY not SELL your DNA (like the other companies do!)
100% Black Owned with Black Scientist.

When I tell you I was excited to learn that I would get to take this test! I couldn’t even put my excitement into words. They day I found out, I just ran around the house shouting where I’m from! I know my husband was getting tired of me, but I was so excited.

I have two videos to share about my process:

1. Here’s the video of me explaining what the test is, how it works, the cost and actually taking the test in preparation to send it off.

2. This video is the actual reveal of my tribe and country of origin. It’s 22 minutes, and I get to do the reveal with the OWNER of African Ancestry, Gina Paige. You can jump to minute 8:40 for the actual reveal.

If you want to get your own test, use code: BERNETTA for 10% off (which includes 2 certificates for 2 other family members) until June 30th.

Question, once you heard which tribe I’m from – didn’t it make you want to know more about where you’re people are from? Have you taken this test or something similar?

Get more information on how to take a test, the two different types of kits (Maternal & Paternal) which cost $299 on AfricanAncestry.com

Motivation

My Autoimmune Diagnosis Changed My Life

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In 2015 my life was changed forever. FOREVER.

I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease. It came out of nowhere and even now, 4 years later I still wonder why did this happen to me. However, 4 years later, I’m also at a place of peace.

Everyone who is close to me already knows. Also, if you happen to see me out and about you might notice a small device. If you’re brave enough to ask, “What is that thing on your arm?”, you will soon know as well.

I’ve decided to share it on my blog because someone else may be going through something similar and it helps when people know they are not alone.

Instead of writing a very long story, I’ve decided to record it on video.

In the video, I answer 4 questions?

How did I find out I had Type 1 Diabetes? (min :47 sec)
What is Type 1 Diabetes? (min 3:34)
How has my life changed in the last 4 years and where am I now? (min 5:52)
How can you (as friends) support me? (min 12:12)

I did my first 5k walk for Type 1 Diabetes this weekend with my family. It was emotional, but a happy day.

Do you know someone that has Type 1 Diabetes? Feel free to share this video with someone that may need it

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