Living Smart Motherhood Monday

The Girlfriend Hit List :: Why I love my real friends!

When you get married your husband is supposed to be your best friend. He is suppose to be the one you share all your secrets too. He is supposed to know you inside and out. BUT does he? Is your husband your best friend or do you have a Gayle (King) in your life? How important are your girlfriends in your life? Being married, do you still need a host of girlfriends? Or at least one? The ladies below are my FRIENDS – the true definition of the word.

This is my Se-lah boo! (Aseelah) We used to be sister-in-laws (married to brothers), but they are now divorced SO we are now just sisters! We live in two different states but talk everyday or every other day about EVERYTHING UNDER THE SUN! We have cried together, laughed SO hard, helped each other when others never knew, ARGUE FOR REAL and share all our secrets. She tells me things when she knows I will disagree but she still wants me to know. I truly love her because she gives it to me BLUNT! When I am right and wrong. Our children are related and we will forever be attached! I pray. What I love about her: She makes me laugh for real & her bubbly personality draws people like flies!!

 
These ladies… no words can explain! They are not only my FRIENDS but both are my daughters God Mothers. (Teresa & Angela) I love these ladies as well. I have known Teresa since 2000 and Angela…I forget but its been at least 8 years. We all met at church but a close/true friendship developed outside of church walls. We do things together as couples & families. I love them because I can also call them and talk, cry, confide and inquire. I look at them like my big sisters because I am always asking them things (about life, kids, marriage). I always want/need them in my life. What I love about these ladies: Teresa, she is so freaking beautiful INSIDE as much as she is on the OUTSIDE! If I ever met an earthly angel, it’s her. Angela, she is my know-it-all-go-to friend. I call her for everything home, child, creative related.
 
 
PPPPPPP! (In my deep voice!) This is Ms. Precious (that’s her real name!) And that’s just what she is, because if she is your friend – you have been blessed by the Gods!! (I can just see her face reading this!) We met at church in 2005. We quickly clicked and became FRIENDS outside of church and now not even an ocean can separate us! She has left the country twice and our friendship still remains. Precious is the real deal. She will let ya know what she will and won’t deal with – and why she don’t need ya! I am laughing, because she never let me have it but I have seen her let other people have it. Bayy-bay (in her New Orleans voice!) Even though she is currently across the ocean, we have a bi-weekly (or monthly) check in which is no less than a 2 hour conversation each time. She is a positive person with a realist perspective! One thing I love about her is – She is an awesome parent! She makes me want to be one.

OK! These chicks (missing one, Michelle is not pictured). These are my HTL’s! When we first put our group online, everyone was wondering what it stood for! Hot Topic Ladies. We have been HTL’s for a little over 4 years but the relationship with these ladies go back as for as 17 plus years. It’s 9 of us and we started an email group where we would do a new topic everyday. Over the years, those topics evolved into EVERYTHING and I mean everything. We have shared so many things, we are now 9 sisters! We are scattered across the US. A few of us live in the same city as each other (Atl, Chi, Milwaukee, Boston, & AL) and there are a couple of bff’s within the group. For the most part we see each other as a group every 2 years but talk everyday through email. We have also cried, fought, broke up, got back together, learned new things, tried new things, gave advice, get advice, LAUGH and LAUGH some more. They are such apart of my life, that I look forward to telling them things and can’t wait for their response – good and bad! What do I love most about my HTL: Too many to name, but they already know – we just had an email chain where we told each other what we were jealous of!! (in a good way) If I had to pick something, I would say – I know they are there to listen (& give feedback) if nothing else. And I will always have 8 different perspectives coming back in my inbox.

I do have others that I consider friends, but I just couldn’t name them all. I will say these ladies (above) are the ones I speak with (& do things) the most and know THE MOST about ALL OF ME (Good & Bad) and still love me for me.

Girlfriends are vital for all women. Female friendships are precious commodities for married women. Whether their girlfriends are married or single, mothers or childless, they are the people that we find our precious moments of reprieve with. We can let down our hair. We can let down our guard. We can be selfish. We can crack jokes. We can be ourselves and relax.

Do you have your vital Girlfriend crew? Whether its 1 or a few.

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16 Comments

  • Reply
    aaseelah
    April 16, 2013 at 2:35 pm

    You just made my day and you know I do most of the calling.

  • Reply
    Bernetta
    April 16, 2013 at 2:51 pm

    I love this post… Friendships are PRICELESS!!!! And, of course it’s a blessing! I thank God for all my genuine friendships. Thanks for sharing!

    Xoxo
    Lynn

  • Reply
    Tasha
    April 16, 2013 at 2:52 pm

    Awww, love u too, B!!! This just made my day. We do keep each other on our toes.

  • Reply
    Rochelle Sodipo Washington
    April 16, 2013 at 3:06 pm

    You have inspired me to do a post like this! OMG! I love it!

  • Reply
    Mia
    April 16, 2013 at 3:15 pm

    That is so thoughtful sweet of you to recognize us in your blog. This has definitely made my day. I feel very priviledged to have such friends as you who I can go to for anything. Yes my husband is my best friend, road dawg and hang out partner but we all need our ladies for the feminine side of us. Someone who we can shop with, talk about men with, share advice with, get our hair & nails done with, cry and laugh with. I am so grateful to have that in my HTLs and any other friends i have. 😀

  • Reply
    Mia
    April 16, 2013 at 3:18 pm

    That is so thoughtful sweet of you to recognize us in your blog. This has definitely made my day. I feel very priviledged to have such friends as you who I can go to for anything. Yes my husband is my best friend, road dawg and hang out partner but we all need our ladies for the feminine side of us. Someone who we can shop with, talk about men with, share advice with, get our hair & nails done with, cry and laugh with. I am so grateful to have that in my HTLs and any other friends i have. 😀

  • Reply
    Tosha Devon
    April 16, 2013 at 4:23 pm

    Awwwwwwww B this is sooooo nice…you are my other sister…we fuss just like it LOLOLOLOL!! I love yous!!

  • Reply
    Ravena Garbutt
    April 16, 2013 at 5:51 pm

    That is really nice. My husband knows he is The Boss the one God blessed me with. And ur Seelah boo, is my Boo we tease our loved ones about being one anothers first love. Aseelah and I have been Sisters for over 20 years she is a wonderful person and I pray for her and my God children all the time. We all need a good shoulder to lean on, a person that understands us and will be honest with us no matter what.

  • Reply
    Raisa Lefe'
    April 16, 2013 at 6:15 pm

    This is absolutely beautiful! I have a couple of childhood girl friends that I KIT with from time to time. But my hubby is my #1 bestie and my mom and my cousin are close seconds!

  • Reply
    Shauntell
    April 16, 2013 at 6:47 pm

    Nothing like celebrating and appreciating friendship and sisterhood. It is blessing to have a ride-or-die team. Loving all aspects of my clique Nicole, MiMi, Mesh, Petal, Shani, Steph, Tovia, Kesha Davis, and Sophia.

  • Reply
    kita
    April 16, 2013 at 8:23 pm

    Love sisterhoods. I don’t have many friends but the few I do have I cherish and I love them I just wished they lived closer to me. When you have good friends keep them through everything.

  • Reply
    CollieNicole
    April 17, 2013 at 4:00 am

    Love this blog! It’s sooo awesome having friends that tell you exactly what you NEED to hear! Those HTL’s don’t sugarcoat anything! Lol! Love you guys! Great blogpost B!

  • Reply
    CollieNicole
    April 17, 2013 at 4:02 am

    Great blog post B! It’s great having friends tat tell you exactly what you NEED to hear and not what you want to hear. Those HTL’s don’t sugarcoat anything, and I love them for that! Love the blog post B!

  • Reply
    Lotta
    April 17, 2013 at 1:50 pm

    Thanks for the Love B!! We feel the same too. I love all my HTLs!! Keep up the great blogpost!! 🙂

  • Reply
    YUMMommy
    April 18, 2013 at 1:08 am

    I definitely believe it’s important to have female friends that you can talk to openly and trust. I know that having my small circle of girlfriends has been a lifesaver more than once.

  • Reply
    Joyce@MommyTalkShow
    April 20, 2013 at 3:51 am

    What a blessing to have such a close connection to your friends.
    Post-marriage and baby, my friendships all changed because I moved away and wasn’t working FT anymore.
    Cherish those friendships.

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